[Subversive Underground]
Article #180
End Transmission
By Keith Giles
A few months ago I hinted that the [Subversive Underground] would be ending at the 200th article post, which would be sometime in August of this year. However, as I continue to hear from God and evaluate where I'm at right now, I have to confess that I cannot imagine continuing that distance with the energy I have left within.
Honestly, my desire to set these things aside is growing stronger every day. I'm feeling that maybe it is time to lay down the tools of the trade and lie still for a moment so that I can hear God's voice more clearly.
Looking back, over my shoulder, down the road behind me where I have travelled and meandered these last few years, I can count victories, savor a handful of joys like crumbs that have fallen from the table, and I know that this is where I needed to be. This is where I was going. Now that I am here, I need to rest along the path, take a deep breath, allow my soul to be restored in this valley, beside this green grass, near enough to touch those still waters and be renewed.
I find I have no patience anymore for any of this. I am so weary of being accosted for holding opinions which differ from the status quo. I am weary of endless comment wars between people who should be working hard at loving one another and who, instead, take great delight in tearing one another apart from the soul to the heart, inside and out.
In the future you can read my thoughts and articles over at my main blog. I will keep this blog open as an archive for anyone who wants to go back and read what has gone before. After all, there are 180 articles here on the subject of the Gospel of the Kingdom, Discipleship to Jesus, Compassion for the poor, and House Church. If you're reading this via email you can reach the [Subversive Underground] archives HERE.
For now, I want to close up the shop here and be done with this for a time. Maybe a year, maybe a week, maybe forever. I don't know just yet. It's possible that, in the future, I may decide to re-launch the [Subversive Underground] and this may restart again somewhere down the road. For now, I need to lay this aside and take a break.
I've felt like something needs to die before the new life can flourish within me again. In many ways I think the death has already begun. I cannot stop it from coming. I have to release my tired grip on this thing and lay it down into the ground. I have to bury it. I have to let it go. I think it has already released its grip on me. I must return the favor.
If there was ever any doubt, let me assure you that all I have written here over the years has been out of a sincere love for God's Bride and out of a burning, irresistable desire to see the people of God rise up and live it out. I still have that same desire, thankfully. Although my attempts to turn the ship have been largely unsuccessful, I take heart that there are new voices ringing out the same call to awaken the Body. Maybe it is because of this great cloud of witnesses that I can give myself permission to let go of the wheel and rest a while.
These voices are stronger than mine. Their reach is greater. Their passion is the same. They are trustworthy men and women who will run this race faithfully.
Brant Hansen
Alan Knox
Lionel Woods
Mark Main
Daniel & Heather Cosby
I gladly point you to them for encouragement and inspiration along your journey to follow Christ and live a more subversive life. Perhaps one day I will resume the chorus and join them again? I sincerely hope so.
It has been a joy to share my heart with you. I am so thankful to God for blessing me in this way. You have been a significant part of my own spiritual growth over the last three years and I am grateful that you have stood with me this long. Many have not. Perhaps you wanted off the merry-go-round but couldn't find the spot to jump off? I don't know. But, I am thankful that God allowed me to speak to so many of you for so long and to encourage you to take up your cross and follow Jesus.
Please, don't let me stop you. I'll catch up with you soon.
"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace." - Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
**
If you want to keep up with me elsewhere online I'll be here:
PovertyInTheOC.com
OCHouseChurch.com
MissionHouseChurch.com
KeithGiles.com
My email contact is at "elysiansky" at hotmail.
Thanks for the encouragement and support you've given me over the years.
"Conversatio Morem!" (Death to the status quo/Constant Conversion)
Peace,
Keith
**
[END TRANSMISSION]
Showing posts with label rest. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rest. Show all posts
Monday, March 09, 2009
Saturday, December 13, 2008
UNREST
[Subversive Underground]
UNREST
by Keith Giles
For the last several weeks I have struggled with an inner sense of unrest that I cannot quite shake or define. I'm not sure if it's related to my own personal "three year itch" or if it's something deeper, more psychological or even spiritual in nature.
Every three years something changes in my life. In the 15 years we've lived in California I have changed jobs approximately every 3 years. People who look at my resume can discern the pattern for themselves. It's nothing I've done of my own volition, but certainly God has established an almost circadian rhythm in my life where every three years I change jobs, or a door closes, or an opportunity arises.
Our house church, "The Mission" is in its 3rd year now. This makes me wonder if changes aren't around the corner, although I cannot anticipate what those changes, if any, might entail.
I also can't discern whether my sense of unrest is related to this or if it's something God is doing in me, or to me, or in spite of me.
Our house church is very strong. Everything continues as it always has, and people are continuing to grow and mature and learn to love one another as we move along. It's not a sense of dissatisfaction with any person or any aspect of the house church at all. Yet, it is a sort of dissatisfaction within myself that I cannot quite name.
This afternoon I had some time to myself to pray about this and allow God to search my heart on this matter. I tried to hear God's voice on this and trace the feelings of unrest to their source, but all I came up with was this- Maybe the empty feeling I have is God?
Maybe I've been looking for people, or experiences, or activities to feed my soul when I should have found my sustenance in Christ alone?
The more I meditated on this the more it seemed to resonate. In fact, it was the only thought that brought me any sense of hope or comfort or relief. The empty feeling inside me is God.
Or better yet, the emptiness I feel is the gaping hole where God longs to find His home and settle within.
I've been working hard lately to finish up my book about God's heart for His church and His vision from the beginning to have intimate fellowship with His people. I've marvelled at verse after verse where God promises that a day will come when no one will ever refer to the Ark of the Covenant again, or even remember it again, because all of creation itself will be the place where God dwells.
I've been astounded to see God's plan to tear down the Temple made with human hands in order to build for Himself a new temple made of people who love Him and embody His very Holy presence throughout the Earth.
Even as I've studied and pondered and considered these amazing things, God has been whispering to me in a deeper, almost imperceptable voice - "I am here"
If there's one thing I've learned over the last few years it's that there's a great difference between knowing something is true in God's word with your mind and knowing that something is true with your life.
Practicing the astounding truth of God in your actual life is so much more amazing than knowing that same truth in your head.
Now that I know these things, I know that I will be blessed if I do them, and live them, and declare that they are true by the way I put them into practice.
"Heaven is my throne, and earth is my footstool. Where is the house you will build for me? Where will my resting place be?" - Isaiah 66:1-
The only cure for unrest is rest and I long for God to find His resting place in me.
Shalom.
-kg
**
THE END IS COMING. WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?
We'll all find out on 8/28/09
[END TRANSMISSION]
UNREST
by Keith Giles
For the last several weeks I have struggled with an inner sense of unrest that I cannot quite shake or define. I'm not sure if it's related to my own personal "three year itch" or if it's something deeper, more psychological or even spiritual in nature.
Every three years something changes in my life. In the 15 years we've lived in California I have changed jobs approximately every 3 years. People who look at my resume can discern the pattern for themselves. It's nothing I've done of my own volition, but certainly God has established an almost circadian rhythm in my life where every three years I change jobs, or a door closes, or an opportunity arises.
Our house church, "The Mission" is in its 3rd year now. This makes me wonder if changes aren't around the corner, although I cannot anticipate what those changes, if any, might entail.
I also can't discern whether my sense of unrest is related to this or if it's something God is doing in me, or to me, or in spite of me.
Our house church is very strong. Everything continues as it always has, and people are continuing to grow and mature and learn to love one another as we move along. It's not a sense of dissatisfaction with any person or any aspect of the house church at all. Yet, it is a sort of dissatisfaction within myself that I cannot quite name.
This afternoon I had some time to myself to pray about this and allow God to search my heart on this matter. I tried to hear God's voice on this and trace the feelings of unrest to their source, but all I came up with was this- Maybe the empty feeling I have is God?
Maybe I've been looking for people, or experiences, or activities to feed my soul when I should have found my sustenance in Christ alone?
The more I meditated on this the more it seemed to resonate. In fact, it was the only thought that brought me any sense of hope or comfort or relief. The empty feeling inside me is God.
Or better yet, the emptiness I feel is the gaping hole where God longs to find His home and settle within.
I've been working hard lately to finish up my book about God's heart for His church and His vision from the beginning to have intimate fellowship with His people. I've marvelled at verse after verse where God promises that a day will come when no one will ever refer to the Ark of the Covenant again, or even remember it again, because all of creation itself will be the place where God dwells.
I've been astounded to see God's plan to tear down the Temple made with human hands in order to build for Himself a new temple made of people who love Him and embody His very Holy presence throughout the Earth.
Even as I've studied and pondered and considered these amazing things, God has been whispering to me in a deeper, almost imperceptable voice - "I am here"
If there's one thing I've learned over the last few years it's that there's a great difference between knowing something is true in God's word with your mind and knowing that something is true with your life.
Practicing the astounding truth of God in your actual life is so much more amazing than knowing that same truth in your head.
Now that I know these things, I know that I will be blessed if I do them, and live them, and declare that they are true by the way I put them into practice.
"Heaven is my throne, and earth is my footstool. Where is the house you will build for me? Where will my resting place be?" - Isaiah 66:1-
The only cure for unrest is rest and I long for God to find His resting place in me.
Shalom.
-kg
**
THE END IS COMING. WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?
We'll all find out on 8/28/09
[END TRANSMISSION]
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